I have written very little in the last couple of years and not without reason.

After the hurricane in 2020 JoAnne received a diagnosis of “recurrence” of Ovarian Cancer. She underwent chemo, which affected her badly that time around. She suffered neuropathy in her feet and legs. In 2022, once more the cancer returned. She started treatments around May sometime. It was the normal thing…. go in for chemo, wait three weeks, go in for another round.

Six times. She finished around the end of October, 2022. In November she had finished the chemo and was feeling unwell. She, in fact didn’t want to go out, eat or anything. She fell asleep on the couch in our office and rested from around 2pm until 6pm. I was inclined to get her to move to the bed but I didn’t want to wake her. Her peace was sleeping.

At a few minutes before 6:30, she called out that she needed to go to the restroom, so I assisted her, because she seemed weak, to the bathroom. She threw up. A lot. We got her back to the couch and se sat down. Five minutes later, she began a seizure. I instantly diailed 9-1-1 and laid her on her side while she was convulsing. I checked her vitals and was doing BP when the EMTs and Firemen arrived.

She was transported to a local hospital. By 0200 the next morning, they called in an Air Transport and sent her to Wilmington.

She had had a stroke and was in a coma.

She spent ten days in ICU, unconscious.

Those ten days were awful. I didn’t know if she would come out of it. She did eventually. By then they had given her a tracheostomy and a few days later she was moved to the general wards. On 6 December 2022, she suffered a cardiac arrest. Again, back to ICU for many days.

Eventually, she came out of that as well.

One hundred and forty days she remained in that hospital, fighting with every ounce of strength she had to get out of the hospital, get well and come home. And she did.

After I sold the boat, she went to Rehab for a few weeks and was walking with braces, but in a wheel chair a lot. When I brought her home, we worked every day. I became her personal nurse and worked with her constantly.

Alas, in January 2024, again, her oncologist told her, “I’m sorry, but the cancer has returned. You have two choices. One is to take chemo again, the other is to choose NOT to take chemo.”

True to her fighting spirit and against all odds, she looked the doctor in the eye and said, “I’ll take the chemo, I plan to fucking fight to the end….”

He then suggested we try radiation first. So in April she wanted to visit her brother in Florida, normally an 11 hour car ride. It took us two days with stops and a hotel in the middle. We stayed ten days visiting her Elder brother (in his 80s), then returned home. Our plan was to make a trip to Colorado to visit our children next. But, when we arrive back here in North Carolina, she said she didn’t want to make the trip, due to the amount of work I was doing just caring for her. It was, I admit, rough, but I could handle it. She refused the trip and the day finally came in May for the first chemo infusion.

She was in great spirits, looked good, was strong, and walking daily with her walker. We were getting out again to see friends.

On May 30th, she sat in that chair and responded to messages on her telephone, to friends, family and old co-workers. The chemo infusion went well.

That night, she became ill. Refused the hospital. For the next 3 days, she utterly refused going to the ER. Throwing up, not eating, barely taking in fluids. Her normal “smoothie” breakfasts were not being finished. (fruit, some protein drink, and milk usually).

On Monday morning, she was waking up and I was preparing her clothing and getting ready to help her get out of bed. She tried to stand and collapsed into my arms. I got her to the bathroom where she again collapsed. I asked, “Are you ready to go to the hospital?”

She said “Yes. It’s time,” so we went.

She was refusing food, so they put her on an IV.

Late on the 9th of June, around 10:45 I was sitting in her room watching her sleep, worried about her. She awakened and smiled at me.

“Ricky, sing me a song.”

I sang “Love me Tender” by Elvis to her. The nurses had gathered in the hall behind me to listen.

I got through the song and she motioned me over and kissed me and said, “Thank you, good night.”

I told her good night and I loved her very much.

She never woke up again. At 1142 the next morning, she passed from this world in my arms.

We were married a few days short of 47 years and together for nearly 50. She was my life for all that time. We raised five children. We have seventeen grand children and at present another seven great grandchildren.

Life my friends is too short to not take the chance on that “Love of your Life”, to go sailing, or write that book. Do those things, and love because it’s so fleetly short.

This blog is dedicated to my wife, my anchor, my North Star, My Lady. May she rest in peace and be eternally with God.