Yes I am a pirate….

Because, you know I stole this….

I just want to say that even though JoAnne and I have not “truly become live aboards” we’ve definitely become (and always have been) travellers.  About a dozen of these things are already things that have happened to us.  Everything from borrowing a washer and dryer to looking for good Wifi signals. lol

How will you know when you truly become a live aboard?

If you’re living on a boat these descriptions may ring your ships bell?

  1. When staying in a house you always come down stairs backwards
  2. You find yourself bleeding from random places at random times.
  3. You and your wife define “taking a break” as moving about six feet apart and looking in opposite directions.
  4. You avoid telling people you live on a boat just so you don’t have to explain to them you actually sleep on it as well… again.
  5. You think butter only comes in soft or liquid form.
  6. You only have 3 cooking pots.
  7. When invited to dinner at someone’s house you spend all night turning unnecessary lights off.
  8. When invited to dinner at someone’s house you ask if you can do your laundry.
  9. The doctor assumes your body covered in random bruises is a sign of physical abuse.
  10. You are the only one who doesn’t want to win the big screen TV at the charity raffle.
  11. You think “Game of thrones” is something you do when two people need the toilet at once.
  12.  Kids think you’re the coolest person on earth. Adults think you have lost your marbles.
  13. When you don’t like the neighbourhood you just move.
  14. You are content knowing that sailing is code for boat repair in exotic places.
  15. You can assemble a gourmet dinner using only one pot and mouldy cheese.
  16. Doing laundry involves a net bag, a moving boat, and 50 feet of line.
  17. When asked for a piece of paper, you ask if they want course or fine.
  18. You don’t want anything for Christmas that isn’t on a Kindle.
  19. Cardboard boxes, wrappers, and packing are thrown away before getting onto the boat.
  20. You define a good anchorage as one where you can get Wi-Fi.
  21. Your wallet contains more boat cards than business cards
  22. You know what a boat card is.
  23. When visiting ashore, you wake everybody at daylight screaming “We’re aground “when you open your eyes and don’t see water.
  24. You define an easy chore as one where you don’t have to pull everything out of the locker first.
  25. You covet new solar panels more than a new car.
  26. You can identify boats by the sound of their halyard slapping against their mast.
  27. Removing things from the refrigerator is like playing Jenga.
  28. In shoe shops you go straight to the flip-flops.
  29. You accidentally put your life jacket on when you get in a car.
  30. You walk in the rain all the way back to your boat, carrying a backpack, a load of laundry,  groceries destined to fall out of their bag at any second… all while thinking how lucky you are.
  31. Filling the water tanks is a full day’s work.
  32. The only thing you do religiously on Sundays is wonder what day it is.
  33. The first thing you do after setting the anchor is to see what other boats you know.
  34.  You talk to your boat and give parts of it stupid names.
  35. You understand and pay attention to the entire weather forecast.
  36. You spend weekends sitting in your cockpit with a boat hook beside you, waiting to fend off the next holiday charter boat.
  37. Every time you consider buying something you have to decide what you’ll get rid of to make room for it.
  38. When visiting ashore you look for instructions on how to use a push button toilet.
  39. A three minute hot shower is pure indulgence.
  40. You covet your neighbour’s engine more than his wife.
  41. Ice cubes are the ultimate luxury.
  42. You have to strap a bag full of water to your boom & wait a few hours before you can take a hot shower.
  43. You’ve googled to see if there are any companies that make triangular bed sheets.
  44. You know that duct tape was invented by God.
  45. You only bring out real cups for fancy occasions.
  46. Trying to find a partner to sail away with you isn’t being romantic, it’s kidnapping.
  47. Your computer homepage is the Weather Service
  48. You’ve spent mornings standing naked on the deck of someone else’s boat, adjusting halyards, lashing lines & freezing your ass off.
  49. You have given up trying to defend your lifestyle and are content with smugly thinking…..they don’t know just what they are missing.
  50. Having sex always rocks your boat.

(stolen from “Living on a boat” at http://www.cygnus3.com/living-on-a-boat-whats-it-really-like/)

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One thought on “Yes I am a pirate….

  1. I see you have been digging into my treasure chest. Hopefully others will enjoy this post and thank you for the link.
    Have amazing adventures my friend.

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